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Between the Tattie and The Whip , I Feel A little More like me every moment
So I wanna update everyone and talk about my tattoo . I got a tattoo. Its a butterfly. there you go .
So My Last post was REALLY personal . But it had to be written .So Let it be written , so let it be done
Having people write in my guestbook made me feel wicked . reading what people write made me feel really loved.
And yes 'O' I know I'm loved.
I will not play leap frog with unicorns Colm and yes fish I will come see you soon. Promising whats his face with the red hair doesn't stalk me. :P
SO much drama at my work is unbelievable! but its fun to sit back and listen knowing its not my shit for once!!
I love the people I've met, And I have no clue how I lived without them . Im trully blessed.
I think Im going to sleep in my car tonight. I really am loving it.
I don't give a flying fuck if its a ford. OR if you car is newer or shinier or has a better system . I will drive away in MY car knowing my mommy and daddy didn't pay for it and neither one of them can take it away or put a limit on where and when I can drive.
I think Im gonna go chill in the whip have fun gangstas
11 things to 11 people
1. hold your head up girl ,be other worldly .Know that no one will love you and you food like name more then me
2. If there was something I could say , some spell I could do to send us back to just after valentines day I would . Know that I know you got shit to do and I will follow in your footsteps crossing off the things on my list I wanna do before I die but only because my first choice is M.I.A
3. you’re one of the most gorgeous girls I know ,don’t let it go to your head. Boys like shinny things and all the glitter we wear at scratch only makes it worse. Chalk it all up to life experience and leave him in the lobby . Play the hard to get game with the boy who’s name is a color because boys are stupid .
4. stop doing what everyone else wants you to . When I get rich I will lend you the money to go backpacking in Europe and I’ll send you a case of coke everyday .
5. don’t look to see if the glass is half full or empty lift it to your lips and drink the liquor , it won’t make things clearer it’s just more fun like that . ‘welcome to tims can I take your order please’
6. one day I will stumble across your grave and I will cry .I will touch the angel on my shoulder knowing that that’s the closet ill ever get to having us as one .
7. don’t ever forget that your boo girl loves you .And that as great as history is , you will never get anywhere looking at history for the answers. You belong to me and jack Daniels August 15th.
8. you can not hurt me if I don’t let you , and if I am dead to you I can only haunt your drunken state. Look for me I’ll be coming to a town near you this summer .
9. In the end you will face your god and when you do don’t ask for forgiveness .You don’t deserve it
10. 4 years and you still plague me . Death is to good for you and I’ve got to pretty of hands to beat on you. Back me into another corner and see what Fate will do .
11. when someone warns you that something is off limits , don’t put your hand on the cookie jar. Fear me . Disappear. I may not have him , but that only means he won’t stand in my way .
Friday June 16th ,
The diffrences between now and a year ago are unbelievable .
I wouldn't go back for anything in the world.
My shoulder is killing like a mofo. Things like this only happen to me.
Had fun last weekend down at Seven , Til some stupid Jurk caused drama .It's good tho , cause Jay and the boys ran into him at Barcode and tossed him and his truck . Yay boys!
Jesse had to come and rescue me saturday night from my subconcious and me breaking down lead us into dating again. It would work better if we saw eachother more often , but other then that it works.
I found this pic on my computer. it was really cool , it made me smile.
I'll post it at the bottom . Im going drinking at boos tonight that should be fun.
other then that things are good.
OH
the 80's porn.
so apparently they don't have classic 80's porn on D.V.D so i bought " undercover lover " on V.H.S ,.funniest shit ever. im gonna watch it now. I gotta find out how it ends. stay tuned.
Tuesday June 27 10:41 am
I'm tired of living a life I don't wanna live anymore.
I've been delt a hand of cards , I nolonger wanna play .I wanna grab the King from my hand throw my cards at the table and run with it . IF this door gets slammed in my face once more Im gonna put my back pack on and find something else somewhere else. Im nineteen and its time I start finding my own happiness.
Tonsilitis is bullshit.
and check out my love and hate page cause there will be a huge excerpt on BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN .THE MOST REDCULOUS MOVIE SINCE THE CONVENT - ONLY THAT WAS ACTUALLY AMUSING.
Ill rant more later
Saturday July 08 2006
Jesse's Gone Again .I Can't Say I'm Really Surprised. Guys Leave , Why Should He Have Been Any Diffrent? I'm Mad Because I Unpacked My Suitcase And Got Comfortable When I Should Have Left It Packed. I'm Gonna Stay Alone Cause ITs Easier Then Risking This
friday October 13 , 2006
Im sick . Really Sick . Not Flu Or Snot Sick , Seazure and Nose bleed sick . Sick -Not Getting better Sick . Not sure whats going on or weather or not this is gonna last or not. I don't know. I have no information and I'm scared , and I'm Afraid I won't see my 25th birthday .And I'm Being Irrational and Wanting to do Drugs and have Sex And Be Irrational And Childish .......and comforted Because I'm really scared.
Saturday Feb 10
I never wanted to think of any one else touching you.
I always thought that would be my job. I liked that position. More then I enjoyed busting people for doing stupid shit ; It gave me a rush knowing at the end of the day that I came home to you.
So much has changed and I find myself wondering what happened. Where exactly everything derailed.I honestly don't know anymore and as much as I say I don't care I do . Losing you as a friend sucks shit and I hate life for it.
Everywhere I go theres some memory , I am constantly going " that's where...." and giggling because of the stupid shit we used to do.
** Hi, I'm Doyle. And I'm Bud.
And when where not saving the environment, we're thinkin' of you, naked, thigh deep in tofu.** LOL...**
I had to grow up . I had to make a decision that made me take a diffrent road. I thought you'd take that road with me. Another accident and this time you walked away from the crash .
I didn't want to give up , but I did. I don't want to think about you being in pain and me not being able to stop it . It seems I can't say anything right or do anything right with you anymore. I honestly wish spinning in circles would change that ; but your gone like papa and spinning in circles only makes me dizzy.
I always had your back . I still probably would.
I'm dead to you now. and all because I couldn't change what happened. It boggles my mind and breaks my heart.
I want you to be happy. Even if its not with me. Find someone who brings a smile to your face the way the angry girl with the mohawk did. I'd shave it back in if I thought it would change anything.
You taught me it was ok to dream again
I taught you that not everyone in the world is out to take advantage of you.
We Gone Like The General Lee II......But Whats Inscribed In Silver Will Never Change .
